Who gave you your dreams?

Who gave you your dreams?

From where they come from?

Who plays with your dreams for profit?

Why do you need so many things?

Why the thing that will bring you happiness always change?

Why satiety is a moving goal post?

Is it an evolutionary device, to keep us moving towards that elusive piece of food that stands between life and death? If so, does it have a purpose now, with abundant food, if you are not one of the world’s poorest?

Or have we been made in this way, by those who understand the human machine, and started to tamper with it, to make us restless beings?

There is always the next shiny thing to want desperately.

This type of want could perhaps be defined by this despair, this doom and gloom promise attached to it: you better get it while it’s hot or you will be missing out.

But what is this constant, nagging fear of missing out?

We are already missing out on a miriad of events, people and things. By choosing one thing over another you are already missing out, regardless if it’s a good or a bad choice.

We are always trading our time. Perhaps this is one of the reasons why capitalism is resisting for so long despite it’s flaws.

Trading is in our nature, and easily associated with desperate wants.

Are there wants without the urgency? Yes. Are they intrinsically more desirable to the urgent ones? Good question.

Is a satisfied person resistant to the effects of the urgent culture?

Maybe this is why society shuns laid back people and talk on dismissive tones about people who do poverty votes, sex poverty included. We often don’t refer to them as people, rather as magicians, lunatics and weirdos. What they do is for special people, either because they are messed up, or because they are saints. Either way, they are not like you and me.

And by doing that we sleep better in our four hours of frantic sleep, or our nine hours of dreamless coma.

Can we stop running? Some people think we can. Ancient societies didn’t run. And in every iteration of society there were people who didn’t seem to run and want and live in consumerist despair.

In the end, it’s all about the pursuit of happiness. Ever since we became capable of abstraction, our goals changed. Or better, became juxtaposed to our ancient goals of mating and avoiding Death.

Since earth seems to be an playground, you’ll find a multitude of people, and varying goals. I’ll try to avoid the good versus bad dichotomy, as it doesn’t seem to reflect an universe that allows for all possibilities of consciousness expression.

It seems like the unnerving urgency we try to placate with consumerism, is actually anxiety in disguise. This anxiety stems from fear. Others have argued that it’s fear of not being good enough, of fear of being ultimately flawed and unworthy of affection. Unworthy of affection is the equivalent of being tossed out of the tribe. A ancient terror, a plausible hypothesis.

But what if this fear of being tossed out of the tribe stems from something even more ancient? That we long to rejoin our spiritual equals, and the anxiety stems from not having yet chosen our path?

Probably not, if we refer to alchemical literature, Gurdjieff, and channeled material we see that the way if fraught with sorrow and turmoil. If we were anxious just because of not having chosen the path yet, once the choice was made, anxiety would be dissipated.

If anxiety can change around a original fear, perhaps the feeling still has a practical purpose, therefore validity: the anxiety changes from what I will choose, into how I will perform on the way.

This anxiety of performance, of making the right choice stems from our paranoid desire of being in control of everything all the time. Which is impossible, but we seem to have a hard time letting go of it. Perhaps this is one of the crucial lessons.

I believe it’s perfectly possible for a person to walk in a spiritual path and be anxious. You don’t need to be perfect to advance in any path, rather you are advancing because you are imperfect and yearn for perfection. Or at least being a little better than before.

Kaizen always.

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